Temples and Trees

I have been re-reading the blog of Charlotte & Jon Temple who came to Uganda for 3 months in 2010 and whose friendship and on-the-same-page-ness I really value. I am having a moment of heart-filled affection and wanted to share. A particular highlight has been reading about their trip to Sipi Falls and the unfortunate demise of the Herbal Essences lady... For anyone interested in Ugandan culture and wanting to map a story of spiritual growth, visit charlotteandjon.com and look at the Blog from Uganda. A confession: I only discovered their similarly excellent English Blog today... and I am enjoying it immensely whilst also lamenting that I did not see each post when they were written.

Today, Wednesday 17th October, I realised that I am older today than I have ever been which sparked a trail of reflection. Am I more wise, spiritually mature, knowledgeable and loving towards God today than ever before? Am I more active in all He has called and commissioned me to do? Do I know, love and value Jesus more than ever? Do I strive with longer steps towards heaven bent on a journey of friendship, evangelism, care and focus? 

A resounding nope. 

And yet among the feelings of disappointment and half-heartedness, Ephesians 1 reminds me that we are blessed in the heavenly realms, chosen to be holy and blameless before the creation of the world, predestined for adoption by God, redeemed through Jesus' blood, forgiven, invited to know the mystery of God's will, guaranteed inheritance. More than that, God delights in us with passion and affection, treasuring our uniqueness and specific bundle of abilities to go where He leads and do as He asks.

Today, there are the grey waters of failure, laziness and disobedience flooding my mind, but instead I (want to) choose to lift my gaze above the horizon onto Jesus. I know that I am not all I should be. And I know that God welcomes me into His throne room today with unbridled, determined love. He knows I am not all I should be! And yet He fills me with His own Essence so that I can throw off my weakness and rely only on His strength. He has covered my past, present and future failings and fully doled out their due punishment. It is done, settled, and I am free to live clothed in the righteousness and acceptability of Christ. I am a daughter of God, loved by Him, given a future and a hope.

I want to change, I want my life to change. I want to know the red-alert urgency of evangelism, the dog-tiredness of serving, the citric invigoration of pennies dropping and the soul-fullness of providing basic supplies to one in need.

Perhaps due to Charlotte's new-found enjoyment of gardening and frequent references to green-fingeredness being linked to Godliness, I picture a tall, wide tree similar to the one below in the picture taken in Tanzania. I pray that God will prune away unnecessary shoots, and focus me upon my primary growth, so I can bear fruit. I want to drink living water, and find my identity, value and purpose in God's stream and not from my own broken bucket (Jer 2:13). I want to bear fruit of God's Spirit, and provide shade to wanderers.